...ever wish that you could just stop sharing yourself? I mean, to close up, lock down, and not let who you are inside out? I wish I could do that. But it's not who I am. But sometimes I wish it were.
I want to be the silent, taciturn one with the impenetrable walls, the enigma, the... the one that doesn't get hurt.
Alas, no matter how firm my resolve to just shut up and not share myself anymore... I find myself spilling out of myself, splashing out into the world around me... and sometimes it really, really sucks.
P.S.-- I can't say it to your face, so I'll say it here-- I have nothing to prove to you. If you don't like who I am, what I'm about, and the way I've chosen to live my life, then you can go imitate a lemming. I don't need your approval, and I certainly don't need your love. And I'm NOT dependent! Chew on that. Grr.
I want to be the silent, taciturn one with the impenetrable walls, the enigma, the... the one that doesn't get hurt.
Alas, no matter how firm my resolve to just shut up and not share myself anymore... I find myself spilling out of myself, splashing out into the world around me... and sometimes it really, really sucks.
P.S.-- I can't say it to your face, so I'll say it here-- I have nothing to prove to you. If you don't like who I am, what I'm about, and the way I've chosen to live my life, then you can go imitate a lemming. I don't need your approval, and I certainly don't need your love. And I'm NOT dependent! Chew on that. Grr.
thestrippedsoul | January 18, 2012 at 10:15 PM
No, actually I don't wish that.
Perhaps it seems enviable at times... but, when you've agonized for hours over sharing one little thing, or when you've pulled back inside the shell so far that you can hardly find the way out... then you wish you'd never tried so hard to isolate yourself from all feeling and all sharing.
PFY on your journey friend :)