That's right. You heard me. Floccinaucinihilipilification. Say that three times fast! It means "the estimation of something as valueless; an act or instance of judging something to be worthless or trivial". It's basically 4 Latin words strung together, with "fication" stuck on the end, and all 4 words mean "little/no value". Cool, huh?


Anyway, I've been thinking about trust. No, not again, still. It's in the back of my head. Though I've started to delve into a couple other topics, they're all being weighed in my head as helps me understand trust or does not help me understand trust. 


I read a book this morning called They're All Dead, Aren't They? by Joy Swift. The subtitle is "A Grieving Mother's Journey Toward Hope". What happened was that she married an older man at age 15. He already had 3 kids, who she loved as her own, and then they had 2 girls together. The youngest was only one year old when they were all murdered by a "friend" of theirs. He shot them, some multiple times, and he stabbed the 4 year old as well. Anyway, the book is her story of how she got married, came to love the kids and lived with them as their mother, the murder and her own emotional turmoil, and her journey to healing and peace. (Oh, yeah, I forgot to mention that the oldest daughter wasn't killed, because she was in the hospital. She died 20 days after the murder, from cancer.) As I read through the book, I came across a couple paragraphs that really interested me, and sparked my thought processes.


   "'God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.' Revelation 21:4


   The former things, the wicked, the evil, will pass away. So many times people have tried to blame God for the loss of their loved ones. When a singer dies they say, 'Perhaps God needed a good singer in heaven.'


   If God had meant for my children to die, how can we punish the murderers for fulfilling God's plan? In a day of man-made chemical additives and cancerous pollutants, how can we blame God for Stephanie's cancer? Years of man's mismanagement of God's earth has created cancer. Man's pain is self-inflicted. Innocent people suffer under the hand of another.


   Retarded and deformed children are a result of man's degenerative state. Babies who die in abortions are man's choice, not God's. We were created perfect, and each of us has the capacity to be perfect. Years of man's mismanagement has caused our diseases and deformities. Man's lustful, self-satisfying desires have turned our earth into a cesspool in which we all must live.


   But someday soon Jesus will return to restore the earth and do away with the evil ones of this world. They will burn just as the tares that the time of harvest in Jesus' parable. A cleansing fire will destroy all the impurities of our present world, taking all the evil ones with it.


  For the first time I began to feel sorry for the two who were responsible for my children's deaths..."


I have been anguished in my mind because of the thought, God, why didn't you do something? Why didn't you stop them from hurting me?


And yet I see that God has promised to someday wipe out evil. He'll stamp it out for good. Is that why he did nothing when I was being beaten? Is that why he did not intervene during the years of molestation? Because he knew that, someday, it would all be made right?


It's funny, because there are also grains of hope yet undissolved that swirl amidst the eddies of my thoughts... but I don't know how to get it out onto paper.


I can see the big picture-- if he had stepped in and just stopped them in their tracks... where's the fairness in that for the perpetrators? He would be taking away their freedom of choice if he were to do that. And yet... sometimes, he does intervene. I don't get it.


So we cling to the hope of eventual righting-of-wrongs? What about all those promises that say the Lord is a strong tower? That he is our refuge and fortress? That he'll protect us? What do I make of this apparent contradiction?


But for Joy... she was able to be satisfied with the fact of a future retribution. Can I?


Is trust based on what someone has or has not done for us? Or is trust based on something more than actions? Perhaps those are the questions I need to be asking...


I really want a turkey sandwich right now.

Okay, so maybe it's not so scathing, but I did send a complaint to United. On the trip there, they broke my tuner and shattered the plastic containers inside my guitar case. On the way back, they ripped a gash in my suitcase and twisted/broke a latch on my guitar case. Really? Even with the "Fragile" sticker on it, and the OBVIOUS fact that it's an instrument? I think someone at United has a vendetta against guitars.

So, here's the letter I sent them:

I understand that checked baggage is at a certain level of risk when it comes to damage. However, my baggage experienced treatment that I believe was unduly rough and careless. On my flight to Appleton, WI from Spokane, WA, I checked two bags-- one a suitcase, the other a guitar in a hard case. It is incredibly obvious that the guitar is, in fact, a guitar, and should be handled with at least some care. When I got my bags back, however, the plastic containers in the case were literally shattered, the contents were strewn throughout the interior, and my tuner was broken. This, I can handle. I can overlook it. I did, after all, sign a waiver. I simply hoped that a little more caution would be exercised towards my instrument on the return flight. Again, I checked both bags, and this time, a "Fragile" sticker was placed on the case, which eased my mind a bit. However, when I picked up the bags, I found that not only was there a large gash in the side of my suitcase, but that one of the solid metal clasps of the guitar case had been twisted and broken. Needless to say, I am more than a little incensed. Do you understand the sheer force it would take to break one of those clasps? I would like to request compensation for the damage inflicted upon my belongings at the hands of your company, and I can assure you that, unless something changes, I will not be using your services again.


So... I guess we'll see what happens.