You know what? Today was a good day, and I'm proud of myself.
I know, I know... what a shift from my sobfest of last night, right? Yes, well... here's the thing about emotions: they're subject to change. That's why you can't base your decisions solely on them. Sure, they have their place as informants, but man, they can be fickle little things!
I did good today, y'all. And I'm not just talking about productivity levels, but more about being aware of myself and what I have to give... counting my spoons, if you will. I'm very tired, but I didn't overdo it. I almost did a few times, but caught myself before I went too far.
Productivity-wise, what did I do today? I'm so glad you asked! I'll tell you :)
I was supposed to go into work today, but a family emergency of some sort canceled that, so I got to sleep in. I was grateful, because I woke up at 8:30 from pain. I took a pain killer and a hot shower (Yaaaaay! I showered today! lol) and was able to drift back off to sleep around 10:30. It was nice, because I got to cuddle with C all snuggly and warm.
When he got up at 1 to get ready for work, I decided to wake up as well. I stayed in bed for a few hours doing internet stuffs, then arose and got ready for the day. I made the bed, opened the doors for some fresh air, and proceeded to clean. I knew that I would have to be careful not to push myself too far, as cleaning is one of the things that I get carried away with super easy. I tidied up the bathroom and fixed the shower curtain that I'd been wanting to work on for a couple of weeks. Then I got my roomie to do his dishes, did my dishes, wiped down all the kitchen counters and swept the floor. It was at this point that I realized that I would need to stop soon, but I was able to vacuum the main living area before I had to go lie down. (I was literally telling myself, "Go lay down, you need to lay down... now. Right now. Go lay down.") (Also, lie vs. lay. I never can remember which is which. I should google that.)
After a short rest, I took S to his friends' house, dropped off my laundry, hit up Wal-Mart for a couple of groceries and the final part of K's gift, then I jetted over to the mall to catch a free, open-air jazz concert with my friend C. The concert was really cool, and I'm glad I went. It got chilly after the sun set so my joints started complaining, and I was getting really hungry, so I ended up leaving before it was done, but it was great nonetheless. I had planned on visiting another store while I was there at the mall, but I knew that to do that would definitely be pushing myself past my limits.
I went home, ate, and rested up before I went back for the next step of my laundry. Then I pretty much just hung out on the internet until C got home.
Also, today I talked to my mom! I'd been feeling as though she'd been distancing herself from me lately, and it hurt... especially because she's one of my best friends, and I'm going through a lot right now, and I really need her support and advice. And with the wedding looming? I'm nervous and scared and slightly overwhelmed, and I really need her right now. To put it simply, I still need a mommy! So I wrote her a message about this, and we talked about it. Sure enough, she's dealing with a lot, as I suspected, and is very overwhelmed herself right now. (She assures me that my needing her is not a burden, which I'm grateful for.) She was kind of backing off, not wanting to take up my spoons and wear me out, but I insisted that I'd gladly use a spoon or five or fifteen to talk to her. Long story short? We're good, and it was not a big deal, really. Just a small bump in the road that was easily corrected with some clear, honest communication :)
Did I mention that I treated myself today? That blog post I read yesterday (the one that kicked my butt, remember?) had some really good advice in it. One of those pieces of advice was to reward yourself for your accomplishments. Not only was today a good day, but I've been trying really hard lately to be good to myself and keep balanced, and I'm proud of myself for that, too. So while I was at Wal-Mart, I was rooting around in the $5 movie bin and found a Planet Earth dvd and a Blue Planet dvd... and I got them! Not only is it a reward/treat for myself because I've been doing so well, but it's an investment for those future days when I'm not feeling well and end up on the couch watching movies. So it's a reward and an investment! Am I good, or am I good? :)
I'm tired. Very, very tired. I didn't overdo it, but I am ready for bed... especially because the gal I'm tutoring is coming over at 10 am tomorrow. Also, hopefully C and I will be able to hit up the antique car show tomorrow! If he can't make it, I'll go on Saturday on my own. It's a kind of tradition for me to go every year, and I don't want to miss it, even if I have to go by myself. I'd much rather prefer to go with C, of course...
And, with that, I'm off!