The most low key song I've ever heard by this group. You can even hear a harp in this one. It's haunting... and I listened to it over and over again until about 2 a.m.

I called a counselor this morning. I had to leave a message, but I'll try again later.

I really want to be better. I know it's not so much an issue of "behaving" better, but of healing the root issue so that I will want to be behave better.

Until then... I want to disappear. Or run away. But I won't do either. I have a life to attend to.

Thank God I'm off tomorrow, too. Maybe I'll feel better by the time my other job rolls around. (At least working with SA kids, I'm allowed to feel crappy 'cause I'm going through stuff too!)