It's the strangest thing... I was minding my own business, making a bowl of oatmeal, when I was suddenly hit with a very strong and vivid wave of grief for the babies that I lost.
I don't know why I thought of them. But I'm very sad.
I suppose in the grand scheme of things it's "better" that I don't have any chilluns right now, because life is challenging enough with just myself to take care of at this point. It would be hard on the little one, having a sick mother, and it would be hard on C, trying to provide for all 3 of us. (Or 4?)
That doesn't mean it doesn't hurt, though. Even after all these months, it still hurts.
I don't know why I thought of them. But I'm very sad.
I suppose in the grand scheme of things it's "better" that I don't have any chilluns right now, because life is challenging enough with just myself to take care of at this point. It would be hard on the little one, having a sick mother, and it would be hard on C, trying to provide for all 3 of us. (Or 4?)
That doesn't mean it doesn't hurt, though. Even after all these months, it still hurts.
Optimistic Existentialist | October 21, 2013 at 4:41 AM
It's really something how those types of feelings hit us completely out of the blue sometimes isn't it?