I love my husband.

My sweet husband... I love him so dearly.

He deals with so much when it comes to my health problems, because no one lives in a bubble. My problems affect him, even though his approach is to merely shrug and keep going. "I can't do anything, so... I'll just keep going on as normal." And it's good for me, because it keeps me from flipping out and on more of a grounded, level place than if I had someone flipping out right beside me, you know?

As he was climbing into bed this morning, I groggily awoke and felt him very gently try to place his arms around me so he wouldn't hurt me, because he knows I'm really sensitive to pressure right now. I couldn't help but cry out in pain the first time, because he accidentally bumped me, but he corrected himself and cuddled up behind me, warming me with his big, floppy self.

He's been talking money a lot lately, working out the figures in his head and talking them out with me. I like it because I know where we stand financially, and I can make decisions based off of that. Even though he's the one with all the money (I keep whatever money I earn, but we all know it's not much), I'm in the loop. He's not stressed about money, per se, but we're very tight and we both know it. It makes me love him even more, though, to see him working out the bills and how we can manage, because I just feel this overwhelming sense of being taken care of, which is thoroughly amazing to me. I mean, I can't really contribute much of anything to our budget, yet he still has me under his wing, taking care of me and loving me. Who does that?!

Yesterday he was talking bills, and mentioned that he needed to get gas because he was really low. I told him to just take my car since I was so very sick and not going to be going anywhere. So he took my car to work, and it gave me the biggest warm fuzzies to see him in uniform, in my car, adjusting everything and backing out of the driveway. I don't even know why.

I just really, really love that man. I want to do everything I can to make his life worthwhile and enjoyable. I think it's working... he seems to like coming home at night :) (Even on the days that I can't bear to be touched.)

I have found the one whom my soul loves... and he loves me in return. No matter how much my body aches and breaks, that alone makes my life so rich and full of meaning that I could never consider giving up. Ever. For the sake of my husband, I will press on with a smile on my face, even if there are tears on my cheeks.

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