M's memorial was last night. It was hard, but it was good. I cried a lot. It was the "goodbye" that I never said. If M's memorial was any indication, I'm going to absolutely lose it at D's memorial. I won't be able to stop crying, I'm pretty sure. It's going to be ugly.
I just wish that the event hadn't been tainted by pushy people trying to guilt me into coming back to church. I literally had someone tell me that God was speaking through them and that God wanted me to do a certain thing for the church. I told them that I was pretty sure they were the ones that wanted me to do it, and that I was not committing to anything. Then I shut my mouth and focused on my watermelon.
In any event... M is at rest now. All we can do is remember him, and let his life inspire us to lead better ones, because he really was an inspiration.
I just wish that the event hadn't been tainted by pushy people trying to guilt me into coming back to church. I literally had someone tell me that God was speaking through them and that God wanted me to do a certain thing for the church. I told them that I was pretty sure they were the ones that wanted me to do it, and that I was not committing to anything. Then I shut my mouth and focused on my watermelon.
In any event... M is at rest now. All we can do is remember him, and let his life inspire us to lead better ones, because he really was an inspiration.
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