Depression

It occurs to me... I haven't had a bout with depression in a while.

This is not a bad thing.

I had been expecting/fearing a turn for the downward, what with all the stress from travel, and hanging out with Bible college friends.

Why should I fear my friends from school? I suppose for the same reason I was afraid to quit Bible work... because I'm afraid they'll see who I really am, and hate me for it.

I'm not faking it anymore. I am who I am, I am where I am with You, and I'm not succumbing to the urge to "photoshop" myself to fit their expectations.

And that's scary. Because, in some ways, I'm not the girl they knew. What if they don't like the real me?

What if I get Bible bashed? What if I'm not a good Christian compared to them?

But I didn't have to worry about that. They just loved me and accepted me... turkey slices and all.

And my salvation is not swayed by what others think of me anymore.

(Well, it never was, but it sure affected me adversely to think that someone thought I wasn't doing the right thing...)

Anyway, I guess I'm just learning how to deal with stress better, and learning to deal with emotions.

That's good.